Bradey Josheb: My 4th son and Warrior of Hope
We celebrated your 12 birthday today! Your brothers and sister had a little party with me— we wrote our traditional birthday messages to you and watched the balloons dance as they sailed away on the wind. Everyone I saw today I wanted to say "I am celebrating my sons birthday!"-- and spill about how much I ache for you, but I have learned to manage my sharing as the mixed cocktail of my deep love and grief is not easily handled by others. In my desperation for your birthday not to be overlooked, I want to disrupt the normal for everyone-- lol, yeah, not a good plan.
Early today I sat alone for a bit in the grass by the stone where your name is engraved - the only place on earth besides my grief tatted heart where your presence is posted daily. The world was a bit shrouded in a haze, even though the sun was bright; my eyes shimmered with tears begging to spill down my cheeks. I felt cheated that your time on earth was cut short. My heart still aches for that life we missed together and I grieve for the time that was stolen - confused that before your first day on earth reached dusk you entered Heaven's gates as a powerful little soul.
While I can't grasp why He allowed you to be taken— My Heavenly Fathers unfailing Love wraps up my scars and continues to lead me in this journey of purpose. We will keep fighting here... in the war for Peace until we see you again—
Strength and Courage— ❤️Mom
